Interesting.

so i was hanging out with my bestfriends sister (girls night) we talked about past lovers and girl things like that. which is very different for me because most of my friends are male and its not like they want to know anything about that... strangely. so a couple of days ago i told her about me and her brother and she completely understood the situation and because my lover is her cousin they are close and they talk and this is basically what she told me. my lover is completely interested in me but he is scared shitless. scared my expectations are to high to be in a relationship. scared that he will have to choose me over music and scared that it wont work out. so what needs to be done is i need to talk to him because for me these things arnt an issue. i want my relationship to be more of a friendship im not a typical girlfriend im not overwhelming and i dont care if you want to go out and do your own thing. im ridiculously independent myself so i would only expect the same. and as much as love is my biggest obsession in life i understand priority and ones self should be at its highest and for my lover that is music. thats what makes him him and to be honest i would love nothing more than to listen to him play guitar all the time. and the issue of it not working out, thats life and why regret it instead of trying. id rather know especially when we are so right for each other. anyway wow, i donno. i need to say something. reassure him that everything will be okay. we will be okay.