Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Can i just have them both?

ive been tripping out on these two loves of mine.... why is it so easy with my bestfriend? and so difficult and frustrating with the person who i actually want to be with? my bestfriend has the ablitiely to make you feel like the most important person and i dont think its an act its just very hard to know whether or not he is actually into me. and i know he doesnt want to be in a relationship and im fine with that. ive told him what i thought and he said that he didnt want to lead me on but you know in the back of my mind its just like but what if we're actually meant to be together? its just this bizarre feeling, we have this intense sexual chemistry and i can honestly tell him anything its as though we have been together for years.
But on the other hand, my lover is new and exciting and he drives me insane. i never know what he is thinking and thats kind of hard to deal with sometimes but he blows my mind i think hes super amazing and funny and talented and i think he is a total babe despite what he thinks, every time i see him he gets me giddy inside. but there is something missing, i dont expect anyone to be 100% ''into me'' i just feel as though im soooo far from his mind that i shouldnt even bother or it'll break my heart in the long run by the lack of attention...    

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when we are both cats